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4. If you face a choice, during transition, between passing and self expression (and you likely will), and it's safe, consider going with the latter.

In the long term, it really is easier to deal with a slower transition, than a loss of connection to who you really are.

Transition can be more than just fixing a mistake made onto you. It can be a genuine life-reset button. If you have the ability to maximize that, even partially, go for it. Be YOUR version of your gender, and wait out the bullshit. It's worth it in the long run.

Of course, do what you need to do to feel safe and ok, first. There's no shame in that, either.


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3. To the extent that "passing" even still matters, is the distance we have to go towards trans equity.

The fact that a hoop to jump through still exists, to acquire safety and respect, is phenomenally horrendous.

You are what you know you are, right now. Measure the distance between that, and how you're treated, as a failure of society -- never you.

"Going stealth" after you "pass" is any trans person's right, but it's also ok not not want to have to. It's ok to fear being pushed into a post-transition closet, and to feel ambivalent about it. It's alright to want to be fully known, it's not a cry for attention. It's human.


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2. The language has evolved, and it's going to keep evolving -- so while you look for terms to navigate your experience, don't be afraid to make new ones up, and don't get too married to any one label.

Never forget that at least half of the language around transition, and transgender experience, has been created by cis people for their own convenience and anxiety-reduction.

Turning this language on its head can be useful and clarifying. There are no rules.


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I have a few reflections and advice on the 5-year anniversary of coming out as transgender:

1. The best piece of advice I got: "Your transition belongs to you." There are no true rules in this. You don't even have to transition, and you certainly don't have to transition to anything established, or understandable to anyone else.

There are no objective body schedules or social milestones. You are free to make up WHATEVER you want. And you are free to push for your standards to be respected and assisted. Transition belongs to you.

Outside of hard-and-fast medical numbers and safety guidelines (real physical safety, not gatekeeping bullshit), you'll encounter invisible rails attempting to direct your experience. It's alright to oppose this, and to call them out. But the core of your experience is your own, and that can't be taken away.


(boosts of this thread are ok)

polish americans are a disgrace to poland, and america

imho należy znacznie zwiększyć liczbę osób w sejmie i znieść próg wyborczy. w sensie nie wiem czy to coś pomoże ale byłoby śmiesznie

Osoby, które nie chcą się zaszczepić mimo braku przeciwskazań medycznych, to po prostu egoiści. I taką postawą po prostu zagrażają zdrowiu i życiu innych ludzi.

You can't make others believe the fact that you're nonbinary, when they've decided to stay ignorant.

But, if you believe in yourself, their opinions will matter a lot less.

#nonbinary #nonbinarypositivity #lgbtq #nonbinarypride

Similar question: broom traffic. Do witches just fly low in unrestricted airspace? Are there transponders and radios for brooms? Do air traffic controllers hire witches to deal with things only equipped with communication spells, or just keep planes away from common broom routes?

Things like the yearly gathering at Blåkulla were mostly accident free for hundreds of years, and the last thing you need now is a bunch of upset witches because someone's grandma got ran over by a Cessna.

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Hi I'm Lyude my dumb ADHD brain literally does not understand how to just fucking give me a break and do busy work, and requires everything be interesting no matter how desperately I actually want to do that thing


If you need help with #Finnish or in #Finland, I can answer questions about language and provide short translations related to your life as a migrant for free.

You can ask in any A/B/C level language mentioned in my profile, although I may answer in English.

Note: I'm not licensed to do official translations.

Contact via DM or on public timeline.

Just typo'ed a servername while reconnecting to an IRC channel, and accidentally put in libera dot net instead of the correct dot chat, and you wouldn't believe where I found myself: Back on Freenode. Who've apparently secured that domain, and are using it to try to trick people back on to their services.

how was everything even tangentially related to oberon the most beautiful thing ive ever seen (these are the ceres and lilith workstations, thanks eris!!)

hey is there anybody on the fediverse who lived in germany between like 1982-1984 and listened to NDR

or anyone who was active in the music scene there around that time

or even any radio DJ's from that era

because the world could use your help solving the mystery of the most mysterious song on the internet

basically, all you need to do is read the wikipedia article and listen to the song and hopefully you'll recognize it and remember who it is

boosts appreciated, you never know, fedi might be the place to crack this case!!! :boost_ok:

You don't have to be visible to be a "real" nonbinary person.

You are just as nonbinary if you are invisible as you would be if everyone could see it.

You are not somehow lesser than anyone else.

We are all nonbinary here, and we are all in this together.

#nonbinary #nonbinarypositivity #erasure ..

selfie, eye contact, vaccination ment. 

yeah I got jabbed again today, thanks crooked wheel

A Bandcamp downloader is a thing that should really exist.

Show older, your cosy queer space is a mastodon instance for those who are queer or queer-adjacent who would like a more pleasant social media experience.